i am a simple potato
作成者

swagmage420:

Do not gas this motherfucka up

(Source: ksufraternitybrother, via emiliataylor)

accio-percabeth:

genderfluid-carlos:

ppl who don’t dress up for halloween bc it’s too childish are halloweak

time to hallowhoop their lame ass butts

(via avengersassemble-inmypants)

作成者

cuddlemonstercas:

flyingbackwards:

cuddlemonstercas:

oneglitterorgy:

urbandictionaryfinds:

hidefjesus:

I laminated a paper towel

why does this have 31 thousand notes

You made it useless but also prevented it from the end it was predestined for.

But wait this is actually freaking me out though, it raises so many questions about the otherwise incomprehensible meaning of life as a collective whole versus personal sustenance and longevity

Imagine if one day you were given a choice: Become immortal and indestructible for eternity, unable to be harmed by anything ever again, and get to live forever.

However, in order to achieve that you must give up whatever your purpose in life is. Whatever it is that you were always meant to do, what you were supposed to contribute to the overall scheme and future of the life of the universe, your purpose… the whole reason you were even created, even born in the first place. You must give that up. You don’t know what that is. You’ll never know; But, regardless, you say yes.

Perhaps you assume you wouldn’t have made any sort of significant difference anyway. That butterfly effect theory or whatever they call it? Nah, you call bullshit. It doesn’t matter - you don’t matter, at least not to anything outside of your immediate connections - and it’ll all be fine, and you’ll just live forever with minimal (or maybe even no) consequences.

So, yay! You’re now immortal. You’ll never die or get hurt ever again. Wee!

But then, centuries and centuries later (not to mention that by this point you’ve gone through horrible heartbreak and misery and despair because every loved one you ever had, every friend you ever made, ever person you barely got to know, has passed away, died as you lived on long without them, helpless to do anything for them as you watched them perish, unable to ever go with them or ever see them again. But I digress), now, you learn you actually were important in the grand scheme of things. You were supposed to be a key factor in the world’s survival, long ago; but, because of the choice you made (immortality over individual purpose), you were never given the knowledge or awareness or resources or ability to save the world that you were always supposed to obtain, before you unknowingly made the wrongest choice to ever wrong.

Needless to say, you’ve fucked up big time.

The entire universe as we know it is destroyed soon after this horrifying revelation. It implodes, collapses in on itself, essentially forming a massive black hole or something. Stars, nebulae, galaxies, solar systems and planets, worlds and worlds of living people and things, and light-years of time and space and life, all sucked up into absolute, indefinite nothingness.

But you remain.

Just you. Floating amongst, spiraling around, rocketing through, suspended in… nothing. With a feeling of such unbelievable loneliness that your feeble brain can hardly perceive, can’t possibly hope to comprehend. Not only are you the only living thing left, you don’t even have one inanimate object to keep you company. You have literally. Nothing. And you are literally nowhere. I mean, technically, you are now the universe - if it would bring you petty comfort to think about it that way. You. Only you. With nothing, no one, nowhere. Forever. And ever. And ever.

All because you thought you didn’t matter. That you had no real, meaningful purpose. That you could never possibly make a difference.

But you did. And now look what you’ve gotten yourself into, you silly nugget. You’re gonna be pretty bored and lonely for that eternity, huh?

Or maybe it was out of selfishness. Maybe this wasn’t because you felt useless, but because you simply only cared about prolonging your own life and nothing else. Hm.

The moral here? Be selfless, and always know and remember that you matter.

Or else, one day, you might destroy the universe. And be left to suffer, and be tortured horribly and endlessly by the void of nothingness that has consumed you. With no way to escape. Ever.

Other moral because I got sidetracked from my initial point - all things considered, would you choose longevity over purpose? Immortality over meaning? 

OR, IDK, MAYBE SOME IDIOT JUST LAMINATED A STUPID PIECE OF PAPER TOWEL FOR NO GOOD REASON

AND MAYBE I SHOULDNT BE LOOKING FOR THE ANSWERS TO THE MEANING OF OUR SHORT, FRAGILE LIVES IN

A LAMINATED

PAPER

T OW E L

IDK MAN,

I D K

Write. A. Book.

What if I did write a book

and the pages of that book

were made out of

laminated

paper towels

(Source: shittybreadybun, via twinkletwinkleyoulittlefuck)

作成者

A Guide to Terminology as used by Western Males of the Species

thescienceofjohnlock:

societyghost:

Prude - a woman who won’t fuck you

Dyke - a woman who won’t fuck you because you have a penis

Slut - a woman who fucks other people and not you

Tease - a woman who won’t fuck you even though she smiled at you

Feminist - a woman who won’t fuck you because she has, like, thoughts and stuff

Bitch - a woman who treats you the same as you treat women

(via diddlydarndean)

作成者
作成者

hereinyourarms33:

killbenedictcumberbatch:

ladycaracas:

ishiidriller:

#WhiteMen

i clicked on the guys profile and i can never go back

OH NO

GO TO HIS PROFILE JFC

(via shysei)

arkaena:

King Gavin is my favourite thing now

(via huntingachievements)

作成者

librarienne:

direcartographies:

fun fact: the reason that the plural of goose is geese but the plural of moose is not meese is because goose derives from an ancient germanic word undergoing strong declension, in the pattern of foot/feet and tooth/teeth, wherein oo is mutated to ee. however ‘moose’ is a native american word added to the english lexicon only ~400 years ago, and lacks the etymological reason to be pluralized in that way.

Oh baby.  Keep talking dirty to me.

(via barebackinq)

作成者

(Source: thordodaday, via thorsicle)

作成者
X-Ray and Vav (BM Vagabond Remix)
By

madiniwa:

Ryan singing the X-Ray and Vav theme song as accurately as possible. 

(via huntingachievements)

作成者

caelas:

girls are so hot???? like i see a hot girl every 2 seconds.  and a hot guy about every 2 weeks.  and even then i’m wary because he might end up yelling something rude at me or making a rape joke or something

(via the-brats-sis)

作成者

yikes:

someone actually said this to me today

(via theyellowbrickroad)

作成者

mockingjalie:

so are we going to talk about the fact that they made katniss look like she is actually 17

image

(via theheatherinsideofme)

作成者

onlymystories:

missveryvery:

nodaybuttodaytodefygravity:

pothepolarbear:

Some people still think Beauxbatons was for girls and Durmstrang was for boys.

THANK YOU

image

image

gee i wonder why

Filed under thing #4982 that the movies fucked up.

(via thestorysoldier)

作成者

shubbabang:

So I work at target now and one of my favorite things to do when I hear something in the next aisle fall is to drop what I’m doing and stand at the end of that aisle like so:

image

image

image

image

image

(via who-locked-starkid)

作成者
作成者